People are mostly ashamed of opening themselves to public with tears. What is the reason of that? Lack of proper breath? Fear of loosing the face we have created? Fear of healing power of a deep cry? Fears stop us. And they stop our breath. And when it comes to a break… read the answer!
Last weekend good byed me with several statements and summaries I made. I had an enormous pleasure to watch Kokyu Sensei act and discuss my thoughts with Mizu Sensei. It generates a huge push forward to witness masters and to be near. You just cannot ignore their spoken words and unspoken deeds…
Last weekend ended with almost a hurricane on streets. It had changed so much. A hurricane is a type of a vicious wind and wind is a kind of air, one of its egos. It took something away, almost blew it away but brought something, too. Some dust, garbage, sand bits that get into your eyes and make your eyes cry. That cleans your eyes and makes your vision much more precise.
Air is life. The whole body breathes thanks to air. Thanks to it life runs through us. Air exchange is much more than ventilation, to be exact. It is refreshing. Cleaning. Removing the remainings, unspoken and blocked words that cork the throat, deep grief, tension seen in human body as stones…
Where does the breath live? As your medicine book states – in lungs and respiratory system. But let me run away from this academic point of view and follow my inner temptation – in body centre. In pelvis. It resonates throuought the body from there. It sends its calmness from there. It explodes with resoluteness from there. Kokyu Sensei confirmed that with just one finger… He did it with his concentration and Mizu Sensei described the “tears” sign that reveals all secrets of its waterish form.
Breath circulates around your body fluently when there are no obstacles from Any parts of it. Especially from throat region, rib cage, stomach and jaws… It is supposed to penetrate through your throat and reach the stomach. Lungs are just servants. They only fill the centre’s will. They are just a vacuum machine sucking the air in and pumping it out. What stops your breath from reaching the Centre?
As I mentioned before: unspoken and stuck words, letters that were to be written but remained untouched, grief that remains without freeing out, undiscovered mysteries, stones that have not turned into tears, throat that is too tight to speak, jaws that are too clenched to open…
Breath is mighty and powerful. If I let it act wisely within my body I allow it act is as a Great Cleaner, if that is the word that suits most. It cleans away all obstacles with its wisdom and power and its own vision of natural health. The harder obstacle it faces, the more resolute it becomes. And as a Great Magician it dissolves all stones in salty waters of tears. A human does cry and knows how to cry. There is no doubt about this. Crying is healing. Crying is cleaning. Let me describe a connection between health and deep cry then: it is derived right from the bottom of your pelvis, hand in hand with sob, shakes the body and sometimes shakes it very strongly, it explodes with appearance of lack of control. Yes, the Nature acts in a shocking way sometimes. Shockingly wise. Your cry knows what to clean out from your body and mind. Take a look at the crying child and you will understand why I call kids Masters of Life.
Can you induce tears? Yes. With tenderness, with pain of prolonged grip, with croud of offence, feeling of love. I could multiply examples and it only shows that Mother Nature uses what She has at hand for healing. The basic question is: are you ready for your tears? We become too stiff to handle them, to let them flow, to think what may happen after the tears stop. This is nothing but lack of trust to Nature. To Breath.
When life ends they take your breath away. That moment closes the Time. I am not aware of any breaths over t h e r e but I am sure tears are not longer required with their services.
Can you learn to breath? Wise men say you can. I think you just do not disturb it right from the start. Leave all stereotypes like: “men don’t cry” or “don’t’t cry like a girl” or many many alikes – they just show the ignorance to the great miracle of our life. Breath and its child – cry – they clean inner garbage and cleans our eyes. What makes you harder – leads you to death. Death of breath.
Do not be afraid of tears, air and crying – even if they all sometimes mix and create a hurricane…
Allow us to present the ancient japanese signs explanation what tears are so you can understand the above easily.
Some signs do not respect orders, they just rush into my life and start to undress right from the threshold. Without words, in silence, without thinking or too much of shame. Like tears.
Tears of happines and tears of tragedies. Tears of peaking motivetion and of helplessness. What are they? Or who are they? What is their meaning and what do they bring? 10 lines and the answer is ready.
rei – a tear, liking (!!!)
namida – a tear, liking
namida (moroi) – tearful.
The sign is constructed out of three parts:
water on the left シ and it is very obvious,
door on the right side 戸 and a „large” below them 大 – it symbolises a man with his/her arms widely spread.
Tears are „a big man behind the doors of water”.
Is it that the unspoken things that we hide within us do build dykes (door) to our soul( big man) and it can be changed and freed as tears?
When do we cry then? When we are speachless, whenwe are to limited to name things, to say something, to understand something, to explain something. We cry when we do not have a clue how to talk. Like children.
Let us try to understand a cry of a child. It comes from the very centre of a child, masterish opening of inner door, it is „me speaking”, even if calling for respect and attention. When we grow and put new masks on seem to dry out from our hearts. Repeating constantly: „don’t cry”, „it is of no use”, „don’t be a girl”… Men cannot cry, women are hysterical in tears… And then we hear about importance of crying, eyes cleaning etc.
Tears of grief are healing, they break taboos, they are a straight way to calming your soul down, they are sometimes a painful lesson of yourself. When door opens – we get flooded with rapid water that leads to floods. But everytime they explode, our horison gets changed and we are not the same any more afterwards. They create some new space within us. A crying person awakes fuss and confusion: attempts of help on one hand but on the other hand – embarrassment because we see someone being dismantled, sheded. We see that person taking of the mask of a tough man, a bussiness woman, and turn into a child again. Turn into a human. Even more human than we expected him/her to be. A real human, bones and flesh, blood and tears.
A child that cries seeks for help in mother’s embrace, in father’s beard scratch, in grandama’s old hands, in: tenderness. Why do i write about this then?
Because I am tempted to look at the sign in another way too.
That big man is our soul and may be it is way to achieve peace with no tears. Only a big man can stop the ocean that runs through us. When we cry – what do we need? We do not need words, no golden wrist watch, no beautiful flowers on the table, we need to arms widely spread to hug our shaking body, to wait fot tears to do their job, to secure us, to make us feel child again.
Tears are also connected with extreme emotions because the stand on a border between a physical and spiritual human. Are tears the words of soul??? May be…
Tears never lie, they are „tears clean”! Even if displaying us that the world has never seen us before.
When Mother Nature sends us a pack full of tears, it is her „yellow card” with a signal that she can hardly handle her rivers in calmness and floods are to come soon, that she has no powers to dry out the millions of drops that penetrate her soul.
I thinh that people who never cry have managed to kill their soul or keep it in anti-atomic-bomb-shelters that are not to be open by any human. They have flooded soul. No empathy. And skin made out of insensibility.
Tears come out in silence or loud, just a little, just with one tear or through the night that never ends, in loneliness or with somebody, often or just because of some unexpedted news comming to us. In dark cinema, when thinking of a beloved one, missing him or her, in a bath tab, driving a car or when your child makes the very firs step in life.
May the big man within us have a chance to speak and may you meet a big man that will understand your salty words.